How To Beat the Post-Wedding Blues

Beat the Post-Wedding Blues by taking some small steps-

You’ve planned your big day for months, maybe even years, only for it to come and go, leaving you feeling a little meh and flat. The fact that the “days after the night before” don’t feel as exciting as you thought they might and that you are left feeling sad after the wedding can come as a bit of a shock and cause some couples to worry. This, my friend, is the “wedding blues.” Don’t worry if this has caused you any discomfort; you are perfectly normal.

Love comes first, followed by marriage, and then depression. Wait, that is not how it should proceed.

Sadly, that is the situation for some. Some newlyweds experience the debilitating post-wedding blues, whereas others are blissfully content.

A crucial part of the wedding preparation is planning and getting physically and emotionally ready for after the wedding; Many couples forget about life after the big event because they are too caught up in the favors, color schemes, and dance floor playlists. It will be much easier for you to seamlessly transition from one exciting milestone (the wedding) to the beginning of your married life together if you give some thought to what you and your partner are going to do, how life will be like, and how you are going to nurture your new status as “just married.”

Couples who get so caught up in planning parties that they forget to envision and plan for the future and remember why they got married in the first place are more likely to feel down.

Normal Emotions If You’re Dealing with the Post-Wedding Blues

Disappointment
There’s a very real let down that brides, grooms, and even wedding party members feel after all the planning is through. “Very basically, planning the wedding has been a full-time job along with your regular job, and managing everything else in your life, so now that it’s all over, you might feel really empty inside, and like something is missing, and…it is!” says Wendi L. Dumbroff, a licensed professional counselor. “Suddenly, all that spare time you spent thinking through things and doing things, is no longer occupied, so it makes sense to feel that let down, especially after the high of the wedding itself.”

Anxiety
In addition to the sense of accomplishment that comes from being with your partner, Sloan warns that you might also hear a whisper in your head asking, “Did I make a mistake? Is this the right person for me to spend the rest of my life with?” She continues, “Including your spouse, no one is perfect.” But now that you’ve said “I do,” his or her flaws might seem bigger and more important. How can you improve your mood? Be in touch. According to Sloan, “things will be resolved quickly if you and your spouse are able to create a safe zone in which you can talk through your feelings.”

Worry

During your period of post-wedding blues, you might also worry about your finances—after all, you probably spent quite a bit on your big day! Even though you need to pay off some debt, your regular expenses haven’t gone away, Sloan says. One of you will undoubtedly experience financial stress. It’s okay to worry, especially about things that are very real and tangible, like money. Just keep in mind that the two of you have just tied the knot and that this is completely normal. This too will pass if you keep working hard and concentrating on your objectives.

Frustration

If you start to become frustrated with your partner, don’t immediately freak out and worry that you made a big mistake. Especially if you didn’t live together before your nuptials, you may learn a few things about your partner that you didn’t know. “Perhaps he’s much messier than you knew, and was able to hide this characteristic from you before you moved in,” says Dumbroff.

It’s possible that getting married or starting a new relationship could make some of your depression or other mental health symptoms worse.

After you’ve said your vows, the stress of long-term commitments like shared schedules, less private time, and a loss of individuality can suddenly feel overwhelming.

Dr. Heather Browne, a psychotherapist from Garden Grove, California, says that new cohabitation challenges can be stressful in a new marriage as well.

According to her, “it can feel like your partner doesn’t want you or love you as you thought they would,” which can lead to resentment, anger, and depression.

Existential crisis symptoms may also arise as a result of the transition to a new stage in one’s life.

The following are my top suggestions for easing the post-wedding blues

Make Plans Ahead

You can’t even remember how life was without planning your wedding! It stands to reason that you might feel a little deflated when the celebrations are over due to the excitement of choosing all the pretty things, making exciting plans with your loved ones, and seeing your friends, family, and everyone you care about in one location.

You and your partner should make it a point to schedule a post-wedding get-together with the people you care about, perhaps for a post-holiday lunch to look at photos or watch your wedding video. You will both have something to look forward to if you book these dates in advance.

Couple Activities

Make a list of things you want to do together after your wedding in advance. Discuss new hobbies and activities that you and your partner might like to try. Taking a cooking class, running or cold water swimming together, organizing date nights and movie nights, making plans together, and enjoying growing together as a legally married couple are all possibilities.

Invest in self care

Carve out time to do the things that make you feel your best, whether that’s getting a monthly massage, kicking off your mornings with a yoga class, or scheduling a mani/pedi date with your BFF or partner. The more time and energy you invest in self-care, the better you’ll feel—and the better you’ll be able to fight those post-wedding blues.

If you’re not used to the concept of self-care, this is the perfect time to get on board. Not only will developing a self-care routine help you combat your post-wedding blues, but when you take good care of yourself, it allows you to better show up for the people in your life—including your new spouse.

Take a break from social media

Social media is a great place to share your wedding photos and preserve those memories for years to come. But if you’ve been spending hours every day scrolling through your wedding photos and feeling sad, it may be time to take a step back from your social media accounts.

Commit to taking a break from social media—or, if that’s unrealistic, limiting the time you spend looking at your wedding photos. Then, repurpose that time into something that makes you happy—whether that’s taking a daily walk with your partner or tackling a new hobby.

It doesn’t have to be forever, but while you’re experiencing the post-wedding blues, taking a step back from social media (and all the wedding photos that live there!) can be a great step in supporting your mental health.

Communication

Although it may appear to be a simple concept, effective communication is frequently the one thing that we take for granted, and if we do not pay close attention to it, it may be overlooked. Be sincere and talk about how you’re feeling with each other. After all, you just made some pretty powerful vows, “to have and to hold,” so it’s okay to tell your partner when you’re sad, tired, down, bored, or unsure of where to go or what to do next. Respect and accept each other’s feelings without being critical.

Last but not least, pre-marriage counseling and coaching is a great way to focus on life after the party and seamlessly transition into married life, which is full of joy, excitement, and positivity.

You may also find joy and excitement in:

• planning a family vacation
• organizing a housewarming party
• creating a way to track your new family’s expenses
• saving to purchase a new home
• preparing a first-year wedding anniversary
• remodeling or redecorating your home
• celebrating your partner’s first birthday as your spouse

Last but not least, pre-marriage counseling and coaching is a great way to focus on life after the party and seamlessly transition into married life, which is full of joy, excitement, and positivity.